--- title: How to Engage Your Employees Without Killing Their Spirit · DickersonBakker description: The lack of freewill and responsibility in the workplace teaches workers helplessness....Here's how to engage your employees without killing their spirit. image: https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/hubfs/Imported_Blog_Media/Death_to_stock_communicate_hands_9-e1447790704956.jpg --- [![DB-logo-2023](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/hs-fs/hubfs/DB%20Logos/DB-logo-2023.png?width=1300&height=214&name=DB-logo-2023.png "DB-logo-2023")](https://dickersonbakker.com/) - Home - Who We Are - [About Us](https://dickersonbakker.com/about/) - [Our Team](https://dickersonbakker.com/about/our-team/) - What We Do - [Fundraising Solutions](https://dickersonbakker.com/fundraising-solutions/) - [Capital Campaigns](https://dickersonbakker.com/capital-campaigns/) - [Executive Search](https://dickersonbakker.com/executive-search/) - [Grant Services](https://dickersonbakker.com/grant-services/) - Who We Serve - [National & Regional Nonprofits](https://dickersonbakker.com/national-regional-nonprofits/) - [Global Aid & Outreach Ministries](https://dickersonbakker.com/global-aid-outreach-ministries/) - [Christian & Private Schools](https://dickersonbakker.com/christian-private-schools/) - [Higher Education](https://dickersonbakker.com/higher-education/) - [Salvation Army](https://dickersonbakker.com/salvation-army/) - [Rescue Missions](https://dickersonbakker.com/rescue-missions/) - [Community Organizations](https://dickersonbakker.com/community-organizations/) - [Camps/Conference Centers](https://dickersonbakker.com/camps-conference-centers/) - [Broadcast Ministries](https://dickersonbakker.com/broadcast-ministries/) - Resources - [News & Insights](https://dickersonbakker.com/blog/) - [Case Studies](https://dickersonbakker.com/case-studies/) - [Research Studies](https://dickersonbakker.com/research-studies/) - [Upcoming and On-Demand Webinars](https://dickersonbakker.com/upcoming-and-on-demand-webinars/) - [Contact](https://dickersonbakker.com/contact/) # DickersonBakker Blog ![](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/hubfs/Imported_Blog_Media/Death_to_stock_communicate_hands_9-e1447790704956.jpg) ### How to Engage Your Employees Without Killing Their Spirit November 17, 2015 By [Guest Contributor Brent Hafele](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/author/guest-contributor-brent-hafele) [Categories Boards Campaign Planning Study Capital](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/tag/categories-boards-campaign-planning-study-capital-) There are some weird experiments in the psychology world. Psychologists Martin Seligman and Steven F. Maier discovered the concept of “learned helplessness” through an electric shock experiment with dogs. In the first part of the experiment, they had two groups of dogs. The first group, when shocked, could stop it by pressing on a lever. The second group of dogs could not control the duration of the electric shock. In the second part of the experiment, the dogs were put in a box with a low barrier. The dogs in the first group immediately escaped the shocks by jumping over to the other side. However, the second group, who was conditioned to endure the shocks, just laid down, even though they could easily escape¹. This theory of “learned helplessness” has mostly been used in the area of psychology, but recently, people have been applying it to business as well. Author Marlene Chism, who wrote *No-Drama Leadership,* asserts that the lack of freewill and responsibility in the workplace has taught workers helplessness. These younger employees’ require [constant hand-holding](http://dickerson-bakker.com/its-time-to-stop-being-nice/?__hstc=253625366.8e78eab66947243b0f04fc1262b3bf6b.1687891367930.1687891367930.1687891367930.1&__hssc=253625366.29.1687891367930&__hsfp=1561754925) and show an incredible **lack** of initiative and independence. This makes for tired, [micro-managing leaders](http://dickerson-bakker.com/how-to-prevent-micro-managing-boards-and-bossy-executive-directors/?__hstc=253625366.8e78eab66947243b0f04fc1262b3bf6b.1687891367930.1687891367930.1687891367930.1&__hssc=253625366.29.1687891367930&__hsfp=1561754925). The good news is that you can condition employees to be engaged; it just takes a little leadership. Here are some ways: ## Asking versus Telling Many use this as a positive discipline technique in parenting. Instead of telling your staffer what they need to do, ask them their plan for how they are going to get it done. For example, instead of “You need to get me those stats by the end of the day,” try “What is your plan to finish the stats by the end of the day?” This passes the responsibility onto the employee, and thus, ownership. Empowerment engages your employees. ## Forget the Past Mistakes your employees made in the past cannot be fixed, so constantly bringing up an event they have no power to change will only disempower them. Disempowerment leads to helplessness, and they won’t have any confidence to take the initiative in the future. Forget the past–fix the future. ## Positive Optimism You want to motivate forward, not backward. Instead of saying, “I just don’t want you to mess things up like you did with the last donor,” try “I think you can really connect with this donor and secure the gift we need.” Again, by “believing” in your employees, you’re trusting them with responsibility which promotes engagement.  Sure, engaging your employees takes a lot of energy and coaching, but micro-managing takes a lot of energy as well! As the old saying goes, “Teach a man to fish . . .” If you teach your staff how to be independent, empowered workers, you’ll have a vibrant organization. If all you’re doing is hand-holding, you have a kindergarten class. ##### ¹**Cherry, K.A. (2005). Classical conditioning. Retrieved from [http://psychology.about.com/od/behavioralpsychology/a/classcond.htm](http://psychology.about.com/od/behavioralpsychology/a/classcond.htm)** --- ***Don’t know where to start? Our team of consultants can provide leadership coaching to help you be the empowering, guiding leader your agency needs.  [Contact us](http://dickerson-bakker.com/contact/?__hstc=253625366.8e78eab66947243b0f04fc1262b3bf6b.1687891367930.1687891367930.1687891367930.1&__hssc=253625366.29.1687891367930&__hsfp=1561754925) today.*** Written by: ## Guest Contributor Brent Hafele [Full Bio](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/author/guest-contributor-brent-hafele) | [More by Guest Contributor Brent Hafele](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/author/guest-contributor-brent-hafele) [Back to blog](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com) ### Get Our Newsletter ### Categories - [Categories Boards Campaign Planning Study Capital (259)](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/tag/categories-boards-campaign-planning-study-capital-) - [Nonprofit Organizations (32)](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/tag/nonprofit-organizations) - [Fundraising (29)](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/tag/fundraising) - [Leadership (21)](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/tag/leadership) - [News (19)](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/tag/news) ### Search Shares ![Facebook](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/hubfs/Dickerson_Bakker_October2019/Images/Floating%20Social%20Icons/Facebook.png) ![Twitter](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/hubfs/Dickerson_Bakker_October2019/Images/Floating%20Social%20Icons/Twitter.png) ![Google+](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/hubfs/Dickerson_Bakker_October2019/Images/Floating%20Social%20Icons/googleplus.png) ![Email](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/hubfs/download.png) ![LinkedIn](https://blog.dickersonbakker.com/hubfs/Dickerson_Bakker_October2019/Images/Floating%20Social%20Icons/Linked%20In.png) ## What does forward look like for you? 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